Friday, August 7, 2009

Practicality and Purging

Should come as no surprise that practicality is the name of the game for this no-nonsense chick. My mind is constantly thinking of more efficient ways to do things. Not all things are conducive to efficiency, like romance; whenever I try to schedule practical romance I get a very unenthusiastic response. But in most other ways, I am looking for the biggest bang for my buck, so to speak. Purging things that I don't like, need, or want in my life as also a passion of mine. From toxic relationships/people, to household clutter, to emotions that benefit nobody, I am constantly ridding myself of the things that keep me treading water in my life. So here are the main tenants of practicality, as defined by yours truly:

1. what purpose does this serve? (to decide if it is practical)
2. do I already have something that does this, and if I do, am I willing to get rid of one of them? (even practical things are clutter if the quantity exceeds the demand)
3. is there something that would serve my need better? (am I wasting my time or resources on something that I will eventually replace with what I really want?)

When purging, i follow a similar train of thought:

1. when was the last time this was beneficial to me? (last month, 6 months ago, 1 year ago)
2. does the maintenance/storage of this thing/thought/relationship outweigh the benefit?
3. did I even remember it was there, or will I even notice it was gone?

So often in our lives, we hold on to things that hold us down. We hold on to toxic relationships (more on that in my next blog), we hold on to negative thought patterns, we hold on to 5 brooms in our garage (a recent discovery in my own garage), we hold on to canned food from 7 years ago, we hold on to many things because of what we think we might need them for in the future, or what they represent from the past. But when it comes to the things that compose our existence, from material goods to relationships, more is not always (or usually) better- it's just more. I once posed a question to a young lady thinking of staying in a harmful relationship, just so their children would have a father: if your children want and need milk, but the only milk that you can procure is spoiled, will you give your children the spoiled milk, or give them nothing? Meaning if you have the choice between something bad and nothing at all... something bad is always worse! Over and over, I have let go of relationships that were bad, toxic, and simply not right for me; I made room for some excellent friends, and I have surrounded myself with people who are amazing and supportive, who I support in return- most of all my husband, our families, my friends (you know who you are).

I have watched loved ones form and continue in relationships that cause turmoil and heartache in their lives. In fact, this has been happening at an alarming rate recently. Some people are bitter and feel like damaged goods after a previous relationship; instead of resolving their issues, they let those feelings guide them in their next relationship, settling and loathing themselves and others who rise above. I have seen people hold on to toxic friendships, simply because they once made them feel good. I have seen people hold on to toxic romantic relationships, because they are lonely. I have seen people hoard material goods, thinking this one next purchase will bring them the happiness and fulfillment they are looking for. I have seen people try to put the square peg into the round hole of their lives, wondering why they are so unhappy / unlucky. Please, everyone, remember that happiness will not come with things, and on that note, be sure that you surround yourself with that which is practical to your life. On the same note, only when you let go of the bad in your life will you have made room for the best.

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